Showing posts with label Friendship. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Friendship. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Dear Virtual Friends,

I’m so sick of text messages…and IMs…and twitter…and myspace…and facebook…and the 700 other methods we use to contact one another which are completely devoid of human emotion and interpretation thereof.

The crazy thing is, we wonder where all the sociopaths and socially inept individuals that we complain about come from. Newsflash: it’s only going to get worse. I think by the time my children’s children have children, the world will have completely forgotten what a smiley face actually looks like - hint: it’s not like this - :)

What’s worse is that the dating game has also come to this point. Gone are the late nights, lying in bed, whispering sweet nothings in your lover’s ear, listening intently for his response. Now you know what happens? I get text messages that read “what’s up.” Nice. Now imagine we’re standing face to face, and you initiated a conversation with that same phrase. Imagine I respond, “nothing.” Now think of how many ways “nothing” can be expressed. I could be smiling, frowning, upbeat, down-trodden, overjoyed, distressed, so-so, or melancholy. All of which could be interpreted as: I need to talk, leave me alone, glad you asked, or why the hell are you bothering me?

We don’t talk anymore. We strip communication down to its nuts and bolts – 140-letter limited phrases. And we wonder where the love has gone. My guess? Love has become lost in translation.

It is said that 65-90% of conversation is interpreted through body language – all of which is lost in a text message. It is also said that communion is a human necessity. Yet, we try our damndest to isolate ourselves in imaginary boxes, disallowing all physical and verbal human contact. And we wonder what’s wrong with us...we wonder what’s wrong with society.

I know, you can’t see my face, or hear my voice, thus making it difficult to interpret the tone of this note – but I think I’ve made my message clear. Call me!

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Reciprocity

Isn't it a shame that the more you give, the longer you have to wait for someone to appreciate - and reciprocate. It seems that the more you do for people the more they expect you to do - and it's always the ones that have the least that are the least appreciative. So you need to check yaself if you can identify with any of the following:

10. You ask someone to do something for you and then suck your teeth when they ask you to do something for them.

9. You ask to use the phone and run up somebody's daytime minutes talking to your man - if he's so great why doesn't he buy you your own damn cell phone?

8. You ask to use somebody's computer and then complain that the downloads are taking too long - you can shut my !@..*ing computer down and carry your ass to the library!

7. You think I'm being selfish because I won't drop you (or your kids) off at home - b!tch, don't you know gas cost $3.30/gallon?

6. You show up at somebody's house to eat and you don't bring anything.

5. You complain that the liquor at the party is gone, but you didn't walk through the door with any (note: these people are also usually the first ones to ask "so when are you gonna have another party?!?!").

4. You hop in somebody's car and expect them to give you a ride without even asking. (The next time this happens, I'm driving my ass right back to West Philly - you can catch the El from there).

3. You always want some head, but you never wanna give any.

2. You hang out all night at the club with someone, knowing you wanna ask for a ride home, and don't even offer to buy them a drink or pay their way in - now you know a cab ride will cost you more than a drink.
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1. You come over to my crib, open the fridge like you live there, and start drinking the last little bit of my home made iced tea - now you know that's a flagrant foul!

I'm sure some people were offended when they read the above list - you're probably one of those people I'm talking about. I could care less if I get your kudos, what you need to do is check yaself! I still love ya, but you need to know - IF YOU AIN'T A PART OF DA FAM, YOU CAN'T EAT OFF MY LABOR (right 1st big diva?). To those who were laughing their asses off when they read this - you know you can count on me to say what everybody else is thinking ;)